From Dan Rockwell comes this excellent post about failure, frustration, disappointment, real power and relationships. One of the best leadership posts I have read recently-Steve
Spotted on a tee shirt in a book store – “When I drink, I know things.”
I turned to my wife and said, “I don’t even need to drink.”
I know things:
#1. I know fear of failure has helped me succeed.
Concern for loss of reputation or respect motivates when things are going wrong.
Ego is useful when used in service of others.
Ego harms when it devalues others.
#2. I know frustration is a good thing when it ignites solution-finding, but exhausting when you snuggle up with it.
Frustration is your response to ‘evil’. No one gets red-faced when you finish ahead of time and under budget.
Four questions drain poison from anger.
- What do you want?
- What’s important about that?
- How might you include others?
- What’s the most reasonable step forward?
#3. I know character waits on the other side of disappointment and pain.
You find character digging ditches, not lounging on the beach.
Grit expresses and develops character.
The only way to develop grit is to use it. When you give up on meaningful work because it’s hard, you lose some of yourself.
Grit tip: Hang with people who have grit if you want to develop grit.